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by brown university researchers-- although really it's none of our business what color they were-- couples were 75% more likely to become divorced if a friend is divorced and 33% more likely to divorce if a friend of a friend ends his or her marriage. and i'm not surprised. i have never trusted friends of a friend. i mean, i'm my friend's friend. who are these other people? (laughter) researchers say divorce can spread like an epidemic through a social network like a rumor affecting friends up to two degrees removed! that's right! divorce can spread like crabs at theater camp! which is why i have always said divorce should be illegal. once a couple starts hanging out with nancy who's got a new lease of life, looks amazing and is spending thanksgiving in turks and caicos how can you possibly be satisfied with your spouse who is spending thanksgiving with you? (laughter) so, folks, protect yourself. stay out of places where those infected with divorce off congregate: the frozen food aisle, dog runs, miata dealerships, or traveling through thailand because (bleep) it. (laughter and applause)
horse burlesque. kurt brown oler? >> my little porny. (laughter) the surprise boner edition. it's the edition of the my little porny you would buy. sthup people who wait in line overnight. can't wait for the unboxing. t.v.'s andy daly. >> i would call that the world's most persuasive filmmaker. (laughter) "here me out! hear me out! " it's a saturday afternoon let me tell you what you're wearing. >> chris: brendan walsh? >> how about requires even less talent than roller derby (audience reacts) >> chris: shut up! i would have called this best little horse house in texas but it's time for @midnight. captioning sponsored by comedy central welcome to @midnight. i am chris hardwick. welcome to our second show ever. people on twitter were very nice to me last night. i was shocked. sometimes, internet, i want to hug you. (applause) not always. but last night for sure. comedians were bating to the death for the prestigious title of funniest person in the world for the next 23 hours. kumail manage yanni won last night. forget him, he's dead to you! our guests are kurt braunohler. (applau
Search Results 0 to 4 of about 5 (some duplicates have been removed)